Monday, December 19, 2011

Well we are back in San Diego after an awesome time with family. It was so nice to be able to spend time back in Ga with my husband! It's fun to see. Going "home" was so enjoyable for us both! Makes us dream even more about life after the Marine Corps.
I am finally finished with this fall semester! Still have a 4.0! I'm ready to just power through next semester. I absolutely can't wait to be done. May 2014! Seems so far away.
Now we're just packing up and preparing for the deployment. I am so not ready, though to be fair I don't think anyone is ever ready to send their significant other off to war. Prepared perhaps, ready... never! I've kept it together quite well though. Just a few tears here and there. I think sometimes the tears throw people off. Deployments are very misunderstood unless you've been in those shoes. Yes, I will miss my husband immensely every single day. He's my best friend, of course I want him by my side! But I'm not crying over 6-8 months without my husband. It's about what happens after that. The giant unknown. I wish I could remember the blog, but I read something on another blog that hit the nail on the head. She said something to the effect that she wasn't scared about spending 6 months without her husband, she was scared about spending the rest of her life without him. That's so true. I know we can do a deployment, but what about the after.  As a natural worrier as it seems many fellow wives are, we are plagued with tons of tough questions. How will he be when he comes home? How different will I be? What happens if Heaven forbid he was injured? Will he come home the same man? Will our marriage be just as strong as before he left? Will the lack of communication drive us apart? Will we still have enough in common?
While I am truly blessed to be able to be one hundred percent confident in our strong marriage, war is just a scary thing. It's meant to be. It isn't romantic. I've seen too many lives and marriages ruined.
Bottom line, I can't wait to have my husband home again. Where he belongs. 

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